5 Tips for Compromising in a Relationship
Every year, more than 1.6 million couples get married.
Anyone who’s been in any sort of long-term or committed relationship knows that it doesn’t come without compromise. In fact, knowing how to compromise with your partner is one skill that helps keep relationships intact.
Couples therapy may be a good place to mend your relationship, but we have a few compromising tips we want to pass along first. Keep reading to learn how to compromise in a relationship.
1. Understand What Compromise Means
There’s often a misunderstanding when it comes to the meaning of compromise. It’s easy to think it means submitting to our partner’s every whim and desire. We think we’re giving all of ourselves and getting nothing in return.
This kind of “compromise” is both exhausting and unsustainable. What compromise really means is meeting in the middle.
Knowing how to compromise in a relationship means both of you surrender a bit of what you want for the other. Think of two water pitchers pouring into one another until both are equal. One is not full while the other is empty.
2. Have Reasonable Expectations
“I deserve nothing but the best.”
In the twenty-first century, this is a phrase we hear often. We want the best we can get, including relationships. We want someone who is willing to sacrifice for us.
While we should hold out for people who have a giving nature, we need to understand that we all come to the end of ourselves eventually. Neither you nor your partner can give each other infinity and beyond.
3. Examine Control Tendencies
When it comes to relationship compromises, why do want what you want? Why do we find our own needs more important?
Sometimes learning how to compromise is difficult because we want to be in control in every situation. We feel unsafe when things aren’t exactly how we want them.
The inability to take compromising tips to heart may have more to do with your need for control than it does with your partner. Examine yourself and see if this is the culprit.
4. Acknowledge Each Other’s Compromises
In a perfect world, we’d always get everything we want.
The truth is, being in a relationship creates inter-dependency (don’t confuse this with dependency). Our lives are no longer our own, but shared. We must humble ourselves for the sake of the other.
Whenever your partner compromises for you, express gratitude for their sacrifice. They should express gratitude when you compromise, too.
This mutual gratitude will fuel you with the willingness to compromise more with your partner in the future.
5. Order Your Priorities
In the heat of arguing about relationship compromises, getting our way may feel like the most important thing in the world.
However, we need to take a step back and really ask ourselves how much it matters. Figuring out where to move is one thing, but deciding whether you want hot dogs or hamburgers for dinner is another.
How to Compromise in a Relationship
Figuring out how to compromise in a relationship is an art form that takes time to get right. Relationship compromises are never something we can fully perfect.
Even after learning tips for compromising, you still might find that your relationship needs work. To address common marriage topics like sex, addiction, illness, and more, contact me today.
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